Tag Archives | psychology

Kids in Cyberspace

By Ruth Ostrow on 22 July 2011 in All Posts, Weekend Magazine Columns

Within 3 years kids will study in 3D surround-screen Hologram classes. Watching TV likewise. Our TV rooms will soon be like something out of Star Trek. Welcome to the ‘not too distant’ future of Science Faction.

YOU only have to be the parent of a child over the age of seven to know what I’m talking about: the vacant eyes so preoccupied by what’s on screen that they can’t focus on your face for more than a few seconds before being drawn back into the cyberworld.

As you talk, your little darling types or toggles. “Are you listening to me?” you ask, only to be told in a precocious tone: “Yeahhhh. I’m multitasking, Mum.”

It gets worse. By 16, girls no longer seem to have use of their tongues. “Text it to me, Mum,” quips my daughter, barely able to contain her contempt that she has to speak and breathe at the same time. I know one mother who got her daughter to the dinner table by posting the request on Facebook. It was so like social death for the girl that, like, she never failed to come to the table again. Technologies such as Twitter are alarmingly succinct. If you can’t say it in two lines, don’t bother. Luckily, I come from the dinosaur era of the telegram: “Come home (stop) Finish homework (stop) Or no mobile (stop).”

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Friendships have a use-by date

By Ruth Ostrow on 15 July 2011 in All Posts, Weekend Magazine Columns

How it is that some relationships stand the test of time and others just don’t?

I RAN into an old friend the other day. It was a chance meeting. I consider this woman one of my true soul mates; someone I’ve shared so much with during the early days of my career. We have a similar sense of irony and humour, and see life through the same eyes.

We lost touch. The last time I had dinner with her was maybe two years ago. And yet the moment we sat down there was the same familiarity and comfort as if no years had gone by at all. We did the “OMG, what have you been doing?” thing for a while, and then reverted straight to the observations, laughter and social commentary that marked our friendship. I knew we would be friends to our death. Continue Reading →

Better than Sex

By Ruth Ostrow on 1 July 2011 in All Posts, Weekend Magazine Columns

BRACE YOURSELF WINS A $50 GIFT VOUCHER TO THE PLEASURE SPOT WHICH SPECIALISES IN ON-LINE EROTICA

I WASN’T surprised by a recent hotel industry survey that showed couples who go away are more likely to watch television than have sex.

Around 80 per cent of Australian hotel guests responded that they preferred to turn on the TV or an in-house movie instead of their partner, the online survey revealed.

It seems to me that most people in long-term relationships are more driven by a need to escape the mundane, and become part of a murder mystery or medical crisis, than have a shag.

And most people I interviewed had 1 to 3 things they’d rather be doing than having sex with their partners. I casually asked a few people who’ve been together five years or longer. Here are some of the answers:

“Eat chocolate mousse; watch House; sleep; anything; eat a home-cooked lasagne; play with the dog; watch internet porn; watch a great film; read Vanity Fair; be skiing; watch soccer; go to a great dance party; be online; have sex but with someone else.”

What are the things you find better than sex? Or how do you keep it hot & spicy?

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Read full story in today’s The Australian

All I want is a little RESPECT

By Ruth Ostrow on 22 June 2011 in All Posts, My Daily Raves

I hate that people don’t show each other respect. What ever happened to common courtesies like returning phone calls or even emails?

It’s not unusual in my profession to wait days for calls or emails to be returned or to have to ring and ring again. The reason is obvious, I am the journalist and i want something out of you the inerviewee. Therefore it is accepted that I am the groveller not the grovellee. I am naturally on the back foot. And if I do want to have your time then the onus is on me to get hold of you. Fair enough. But in daily interactions based on equality the groveller/ grovellee situation doesn’t work. I know friends who only ever wait for you to contact them, or people who are “too busy” to return calls – as if we aren’t all busy.

In my view it is courteous and respectful to drop someone a one-line email saying, too busy to write now, will get to you by the end of the week; or leave that message on the mobile. It is easy enough for the busiest of us to set time aside each day just to show respect. It is about acknowledging others and making them feel seen and heard even if we don’t want to deal with the issue they are contacting us about.

It makes people feel like they are invisible if we leave them dangling, This one really makes me mad. What about you?

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Activist blues

By Ruth Ostrow on 21 June 2011 in All Posts, My Daily Raves

Sitting here this morning at my computer, just read that they are to resume live exports to Indonesia within weeks. Industry lobbying against the move to ban exports is too strong. Both Governments and opposition are in favour of resuming trade. They have promised to closely monitor the Indonesians but the minister announced today that forcing Indonesia to use stunning is impossible. What has been achieved?

How do we as an apathetic or simply busy group of people get these archaic horrific practices stopped. I just feel so weak and powerless. Even with all my readers and media clout there is nothing much I can do. I’m at a total loss. I wonder how those incredible activists in the past who’ve won civil rights for so many minority groups around the world have found the time and passion to change their worlds?

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Plastic poison

By Ruth Ostrow on 17 June 2011 in All Posts, Weekend Magazine Columns

I hate lights left on all night in city buildings, glossy junk mail, plastic bottles. Share your pet company waste hates here and let’s try to make a difference!

ONE of my readers made a disturbing comment on a blog I wrote which showed a distinctly defeatist view about taking a stand. It was in relation to the story about animal exports to Indonesia.

To paraphrase, he said: “If we don’t supply them someone else will. And then our farmers will be the only ones who get hurt.”

I replied that history is too often tragically shaped by silence. As philosopher Edmund Burke said, “All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.” One person has to step forward and say: “No more!” Continue Reading →

Four Corners animal cruelty

By Ruth Ostrow on 4 June 2011 in All Posts, Animal Welfare

Help stop the horror of animal export. Please post comments for a protest letter to the Government.

The Government is cracking down on live exports to Asia after horrific footage shown on Four Corners taken by an animal rights activists, blew the lid on the unspeakable cruelty that is going on under our noses.

But farmers are already putting the heat on the Government hoping for a backdown, according to The Australian. We must remain vigilant in our efforts to ensure that such needless suffering is stopped. Please help by raising your voices.

Use this blog to express your feelings!

Intuitive Animals

By Ruth Ostrow on 25 May 2011 in All Posts, Animal Welfare

I once witnessed the loyalty of a dog who sensed his Master was soon to die, and sat at the foot of the bed whimpering for days before an operation. The dog never left the spot by the bed until he was dragged away.

The story I have talked about is one that is dear to my heart. The man going to have the operation was my father and the dog was our loyal family pet Pipi who lived with my father and adored him. For a few days Pipi cried before my father went into hospital. Dad, sadly, never returned. And somehow his dog knew what none of us would have dared to face. Continue Reading →

One Man’s Meat

By Ruth Ostrow on 23 April 2011 in All Posts, Animal Welfare, Weekend Magazine Columns

A controversy is brewing and I need your comments for a letter to the meat industry. Would you prefer hormone-free, free-range meat or are concerns about food shortages more important than compassion to animals?

IT’S a complex moral dilemma indeed. A few weeks ago, 35 veterinary scientists put an advertisement in this paper promoting the use of hormones in meat, and giving reasons why hormones were better for livestock, people and the environment. The ad was in response to Coles’ saying it was promoting hormone-free meat. Continue Reading →

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